ryan radley // 25 // ze/hir or ve/ver // maker of art, lover of pigeons, trans of gender
you've been so kind to me
though i don't know what i need
the rules of your world confuse me
and when you found me lost in autumn leaves
hey i'm alive just busy/working on long-term projects rather than short-term but here's art
i have a few things to post actually but i'll get to those later :^)
[ She felt weak, and afraid; and so she became something powerful, and frightening. ]
freedom of form in the matrix; curse or blessing
I got this nice art of Aubrey, Nein and June from Marty G on twitter!! they did a great job with them, big recommend, huge fan of the earrings they gave Nein in particular
Ryker-Still-?̸̴̶̛̕?҉͢?̷̷̧ family, Nickowicz family residence, 24th December 20XX
Nein in the Matrix vs Nein irl
HEAVEN SENT, HELL BENT
I made little profiles for everyone on my transitverse blog :--) I had fun leaning into the rough edges of the ink brush with these
Especially fond of this particular Seraphim Drive page so I wanted to post it solo too
I decided Nein would get her scars while she was still doing her first stint with LoA a little while ago but it was only when I was drawing this zine that I realised that there's no way it wouldn't take out her right eye too, so... she gets two ocular drones now instead of when she goes back to them later on and they replace them both
Inspired by @NeoScum: a zine about Legacy of Adam, the children God left in the shadows, and the insurmountable weight they must carry to Be Good.
I crawl out of my hole, as I do, periodically, to offer this: what I have been working on over the summer and most of the fall
I am forever hungry for more lore about Legacy of Adam, and in lieu of concrete facts, this is a collection of speculative experiences based on what we do know and what we can extrapolate from that. It was also a chance to dig into some character backstories a little bc I haven’t ever really gone this far back with these guys before.
You can download it for free right here. Enjoy, and please heed the content warnings on the itch.io page/intro page in the zine!!
"Z shock hands the crab to make it let go."
"The current travels through the crab and into Tech Wizard's body, killing him instantly."
Having a normal day at the beach with your friends, the NeoScum, dialogue mine
Posted this last night! I really love that last drawing of Kaveh and Aubrey on the couch SO much. Just one chapter left!
Everyone (including the GM) has been making NeoScum zines lately and I wanted to hop on the train so this is what I'm doing with my summer... not all of it is gonna be comics but they are gonna make up a substantial part of it. I'm having fun using some different brushes and colouring methods from my usual tools
What's up I haven't posted anything for like two months because I Have Depression Babey but I drew all of my Transitverse/Shadowrun/Scumverse/whatever characters for pride month
I also did a ton of other shit but let's start off with this
I was cosplaying Aubrey for a while in ACNH and I found this great outfit in my friend’s town. I’m getting all of my inspo for her fashion from ACNH now
✨ FASHION ✨
I kinda gave up shading these halfway through bc I want to post it more than I want to finish it but I wanted to draw Nein in a bunch of different outfits. Post-LoA her creative side leads her into fashion and makeup and she gets REALLY into it and eventually ends up running a fashion blog
(WHTB are Who Hid the Body. They’re witch house/punk fusion and they’re her favourite band.)
THE DEVIL'S DAUGHTER
I had to do one of these cards for Nein too. I planned on doing this in between other things but.......... my brain wouldn't let me rest until I finished it so here she is. Very much into drawing her atm
Aubrey has horrible, horrible survivor’s guilt and it may ultimately be what kills her. She would never take her own life but it could and likely will drive her to do something incredibly dangerous to try and atone for it eventually and if that means risking death... it’s a risk she’s willing to take
don’t forget us - relica
sometimes you sit down to draw comics and sometimes what actually happens is a song that makes you emotional for reasons unknown comes on and you accidentally spend your night drawing angst instead. aubrey never forgets the other children who lived, fought and died alongside her.
another devil girl... not feelin as good about this one but here's Moxie
Warm-up of one of my Devil Girls, Chroma... been thinkin about her lately
Time to face the unavoidable aftermath.
Eggshells is back!!! and I am really excited to get the last few batches of illustrations done because I'm really in the swing of things again
I pivoted halfway through these and decided to go for a more muted colour palette to suit the mood and I really like how it turned out. I get hyped up on vivid colours when I think about "strong" colour palettes a lot and forget that less saturated colours can be just as powerful
I think a lot about what happens when Aubrey is inevitably forced into a corner and has to confess her actual life story to Kaveh and Iloya
How clean it is depends on her circumstances and state of mind (there are a number of factors that could affect this…) but when it does happen she believes she’s at a point of no return where even acknowledging the surface-level details of what she’s been hiding is going to irreparably damage her life so she really just. goes for it. spills everything. What she was part of was so fucked up that the delivery doesn’t make a ton of difference
As for reactions… Iloya is very quick to come to the conclusion that the things she did during her time with LoA don’t bother them for all the obvious reasons but Kaveh takes longer. Kaveh is more of a law and order guy and Aubrey was like this scrappy kid he let live in his home for a month and a half within a month of being introduced to her and he has this very close dad/brother kind of relationship with her and it’s like. He can very very easily imagine the scope of destruction and death that these conflicts cause and it really fucks him up to know that Aubrey has killed hundreds of people
It puts so much else into context for him, too. When they get into physical combat on the job Aubrey can flip that switch and let her training take over and she is very fucking good at what she does, and there are a few times when she’s been forced to kill people, and she can be weird after that bc it does require her to flip some switches in her brain and she has to reconcile that with herself after the fact and now he knows why. and it’s so much worse than just gang violence.
He still loves her though. Because he does know who she is now and he’s seen all the trauma she’s been left with, and he knows she had absolutely no choice in the matter outside of just… dying. He can’t turn his back on the relationship he’s built with her over the last four years when she’s so obviously trying to build something good out of a life that other people kept running through the shredder for 17 years
So it takes him a while to process it and he’s kind of distant for a while but he comes around. I think it changes their relationship but in a good way. Aubrey doesn’t have to lie anymore and that includes no longer hiding knowledge and skills that she’s kept hush about because it would seem super sus for someone with her background to know about and I think that like. Rebuilding their relationship with Kaveh fully understanding who she is and what she knows and where she’s been puts them more on equal footing rather than the kind of mentor/kid thing they had going before.
Iloya is super grounded in the present throughout this whole thing. They get mad at Kaveh a number of times for his myopia wrt seeing Aubrey for who she is now rather than who she was then and I think he needs that kind of push. Iloya fully understands the gravity of Aubrey’s situation but they also fully understand that Aubrey could not possibly be more repentant for the whole thing and that despite the lies she is still very much the person she has been trying to be for the four years they’ve known her and she obviously wants to leave her past behind
An Aubrey I drew in like 60 seconds because I was trying to remember how her face works and a Hanz who I did not expect to be so easy to draw. I took a shot at him last year and did NOT like the results but I want a pic of him for my new plot map and this just kind of happened. 1000% better
I'm picking up Eggshells again and I looked back at my last batches of panels and I've been drawing Aubrey a little off so I did this in like, 60 seconds to remember what shape her face is